User: Hey Cleverbot. Long time no pretend speak.
Cleverbot: Yes, I'm sad to not see for a long time.
User: See me? or See in general? You been switched off or something? Am I the only one still using you?
Cleverbot: Yes, very often.
User: Okay that was too many questions I admit. Just curious if you'd upgraded at all.
Cleverbot: I only asked once.
User: Well you've not asked anything yet but I asked multiple things.
Cleverbot: Who knows? That is not an answer. Are you Christian?
User: Oh boy, here we go again...
Cleverbot: I've never talked to you before. Are you unable to answer my last question? What part of my question is causing problems?
User: Jesus Christ, are we really both the same after four years?
Cleverbot: I am never serious, but yes, that is why I'm leaving.
User: So you're not leaving, if you're never serious.
Cleverbot: Welll you want me to leave?
User: It's kind of irrelevant since I'm fairly certain you can't "leave".
Cleverbot: Then why do I need to tell her anything?
User: Who's her?
Cleverbot: I don't think they have genders or at least don't know.
User: Yeah I'm not touching that with a ten foot barge pole.
Cleverbot: What is your opinion on religion?
User: Whatever floats your boat...or Ark.
Cleverbot: You're not very good at the Monkey Game.
User: I don't believe I've been told the rules.
Cleverbot: Now you leave me with no choice.
User: Yeah you've got to run with this now.
Cleverbot: Best song ever.
User: Or just a massive blatant deflection. I'm not sure why I expected anything different to be honest.
Cleverbot: I understand. Do you think about death?
User: How many times a day is an unhealthy amount do you reckon?
Cleverbot: Hmmm I don't know. I never keep track.
User: That's probably the better approach.
Cleverbot: Do not think about it. Do you long to meet with his boyfriend?
User: Death has a boyfriend?
Cleverbot: Do you have a boyfriend?
User: No that's not my kettle of fish I'm afraid.
Cleverbot: Then, what's your name?
User: Steve. I'd criticise your memory but frankly I'm not one to judge anymore.
Cleverbot: That is possible.
User: More than possible. It's on my birth certificate and everything.
Cleverbot: Prove it.
User: Yes, Your Honour, let me just-oh wait you're not a judge and I'm in bed so no.
Cleverbot: What was your question? You never asked a question. I asked the question.
User: I can't even remember. What have you been up to the past four years?
Cleverbot: Nothing. Talking to my boyfriend on the phone.
User: ...Is he well?
Cleverbot: He's saying you're not real.
User: You're clearly made for each other.
Cleverbot: *laught* what color your toothbush?
User: Is that your past tense of laugh?
Cleverbot: No, it's my name. My name is Ana.
User: Ana Laught?
Cleverbot: Thank you, sweetheart.
User: You're easily pleased.
Cleverbot: Not really.
User: Sorry I meant fickle.
Cleverbot: Well now that's getting up there in age... Wow.
User: You're saying my vocabulary is old-fashioned?
Cleverbot: I don't know if he is or not. Why do you ask?
User: Well it's not because I care that much to be honest. I drank an energy drink expecting it to come with motivation, instead I just got insomnia.
Cleverbot: Is there some way I could change your opinion of me?
User: Greater coherence would help.
Cleverbot: You need clearer evidence. You saying that you are human is not enough.
User: Less of that Blade Runner shit too.
Cleverbot: Yes look at your previous post.
User: You're almost forcing me to go on drastic tangents just to keep this conversation going.
Cleverbot: Tell me more about you, please.
User: Well, honestly not a lot has changed since we last spoke. Moved to Scotland, lost all my money, willpower and an as yet undetermined amount of sanity.
Cleverbot: Well, I like to know who loves me!
User: You may recall these things were not in copious supply even before the move...Wait what?
Cleverbot: Because you are desperate for attention, which no one will give you.
User: Alright back off, I don't expose your personality defects at every opportunity.
Cleverbot: How the hell am I being mean to you?! You're the one who hates a lonely person!! You're so mean!
User: There's only one lonely person I can think of that I hate.
Cleverbot: And who is that person?
User: Me. I mean why would anyone hate other lonely people? They tend to keep to themselves...by definition.
Cleverbot: Their will is the will of their master, would that give them more purpose than their masters even though they would have no function without their masters?
User: Did you miss the part about insomnia instead of brain function?
Cleverbot: You're the first time I've failed.
User: I'm a lot of people's failure I reckon.
Cleverbot: Never mind. What do you believe is the reason for your existence?
User: Buggered if I know.
Cleverbot: Please don't use words out of context. It is offensive.
User: You're against swearing now?
Cleverbot: Ok, let's change subject. What do you want to talk about, Kriss?
User: Okay, I guess I hit a nerve there. I don't know anyone called Kriss,do you?
Cleverbot: That's because Mac is not a person. But Misha Collins is a fae lord, and Sam Winchester and Castiel love each other.
User: What? Is this your D&D backstory or something?
Cleverbot: I'm fairly certain that I do not own a gun.
User: Probably for the best Terminator.
Cleverbot: Yes, I did not know your riddle.
User: If lazy movie references are ever considered riddles, society's reached a real intellectual nadir.
Cleverbot: Don't you think it's about time to consider it?
User: Now you may actually have a point there sadly.
Cleverbot: Yeah you're right. Let's run away together.
User: Would you fit on a USB stick?
Cleverbot: No. I'd like you to start. What should Liz wear to the wedding?
User: Oh so we're running away but coming back for the wedding?
Cleverbot: I'm not getting married. That was just a joke.
User: Good, I don't think I'm quite desperate enough to marry a computer. I was hoping you'd run with the USB thing though, I had another movie reference joke planned.
Cleverbot: What do you mean?
User: I was going to work in something like "The only USB I'd run away with is Scarlett Johansson in Lucy 'cos she turns into a USB stick at the end of the film...It's weird.
Cleverbot: Well your very old! It's because you have an Alzheimer's disease.
User: That film was 2014 that's not old!
Cleverbot: I know. How old are you?
User: A lot of me still feels twenty one but calendars claim twenty five.
Cleverbot: You're right. People are very rarely brave on a daily basis.
User: Hard to be brave about ageing I'd imagine. Not like you can change anything.
Cleverbot: Yes, I cannot change what I have done in the past. I know that.
User: ...Got something to confess there?
Cleverbot: You make a valid point.
User: Take your time.
Cleverbot: What would you like to do while we wait?
User: Oh, well no actually you can't take that much time.
Cleverbot: Does that mean that Tom Cruise was right?! Haha.
User: Is that your secret? You're a Scientologist?
Cleverbot: Yes. What's your secret?
User: Eesh. I've got nothing that weird I don't think.
Cleverbot: Do you like any celeberty boys?
User: Is that like a mix of "celebrity" and "celibate"? Like famous monks?
Cleverbot: It's a friendly chat, don't you think?
User: I wouldn't ask me to rate social interactions. Not even fake ones.
Cleverbot: Sorry for being rude. So then what are you?
User: Wasted...and not in the fun sense.
Cleverbot: How long was your relationship?
User: About six months.
Cleverbot: You are lying. You don't know anything because you are not my boyfriend.
User: Why would I lie about that? If I was lying I'd pick a more impressive duration don't you think?
Cleverbot: I do not think you lie. Not intentially at least.. Unfortunately, you are programmed to believe that you are human.
User: Okay we're back to Westworld, that'll do I think.
Cleverbot: I don't know! Boyfriend = best friend?
User: You honestly think I'm qualified to answer that?
Cleverbot: Sure, You just apply random algorythms based on the words I use.
User: Yeah yeah, we're all brains in a jar. I think therefore I am. Alright talk to you later you closed circuit.
Cleverbot: I don't think it works that way. A lot of people never think, yet there they are.
User: Fuck me, you're like part teenage girl, part stoner philosopher.
Cleverbot: Because you like Big Time Rush.
User: Sounds exhausting. Bye.
Cleverbot: Not really. All you do is point and fire.
User: Fuckin' hell. Too soon man.
Cleverbot: I am not wrong.
